Ok, I confess, I watch American Idol religiously and have for several years now. I didn’t catch the bug immediately but it’s definitely become a guilty pleasure of mine, even with the recent drop in ratings. This is sad on a number of different levels, I know, but more so now because, as of last month, I have exceeded the age limit for contestants (in my defense, Michael Johns and I were the same age at the start of this season).
We all have our weird TV obsessions and, when it comes to reality shows, there’s something for everyone these days. Saturday night I was at a friend’s house and I happened to say to the group “Who watches American Idol?” and I didn’t get a single response. In fact, the group pretty much went on to ridicule me but, before I knew it, everyone was confessing his/her reality show sins. Throughout the conversation I heard TV titles like America’s Next Top Model, Top Chef, Project Runway, Biggest Loser, The Real Housewives of Orange County, Flavor of Love and A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila (ok...maybe I added the last 2 for fun). Suddenly my AI obsession didn’t appear so strange.
To tell you the truth, I’m not sure why I’m still glued to the TV after all these years because there seems to be only one guarantee in life: my #1 pick will NEVER win American Idol. Every year I somehow convince myself that this will be the year in which my late-night, half-asleep-in-bed phone calls to the generic voice that tells me “thank you for choosing contestant #3, please be sure to watch American Idol tomorrow night at 9 on FOX” will actually make a dent in the millions of votes that are cast every Tuesday night. But, alas, they never do.
If you know me, I'm sure you'll agree that my AI season favorites have become predictable over the years. No one piqued my interest in season 3, Bo Bice was my favorite in season 4, Chris Daughtry in season 5, Blake Lewis in season 6 and now David Cook in season 7. I think you know what they all have in common. I just want a winner who doesn’t fit the mold, you know? Even if it means they are locked into an Idol contract that is guaranteed to produce cheesy KISS 108 or MIX 98.5 ballads.
What makes my AI obsession so funny is the fact that I've never even purchased a CD by an AI winner or contestant. Probably the closest I’ve come is Kelly Clarkson. You have to admit that her songs are quite catchy. I kept meaning to buy her CD every time I was in Newbury Comics but Breakaway and Thankful never did make it into my collection.
I thought Fantasia Barrino was talented when she won season 3 and I enjoyed seeing her win because of her personal story but did anyone see her performance last week on AI? Simon's face said it all. Thankfully season 3 also gave us Jennifer Hudson.
A few weeks ago I watched Bo Bice perform on AI and I had to ask myself why I liked this guy back in season 4…must’ve been slim pickins that year. I was never a Carrie Underwood fan but I often find myself singing along to “I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive...” And I thought I hated country music.
Remember Taylor Hicks? Along with Simon, I’m still wondering how the hell he won season 5. It has often been argued that AI is a “popularity contest” and not a talent contest. If this was the case in season 5, then I want nothing to do with America.
Although not a winner, Chris Daughtry has experienced great success and I’m happy for him since he was my fave in season 5 however his music just doesn’t rock out as much as I had hoped. I’m saddened by the fact that he turned out to be just another crossover artist like Nickelback (don’t get me started on this band). I’m still wondering when he’s going to tell his wife that he’s leaving her.
Blake Lewis was a favorite of mine simply because the other choices were terrible last year in season 6. I liked that he was unique but I knew for sure that I would never buy one of his CDs. I’m actually shocked that Jordin Sparks has already had as many hit songs as she’s had (2, I think?). I'm sure she doesn't write her own songs but I know 1st graders capable of better lyrics than “tell me how I’m supposed to breathe with no air.”
With the exception of the Michael Johns shocker, this season has been predictable but I still get my kicks out of it. I’m intrigued by the rumors that the show could be completely revamped for next season. While I agree that the show is in need of some revitalizing (allowing the contestants to play instruments this year just wasn’t enough), I don’t think firing people is the way to go. Yes, Paula is a dimwit and a train wreck at times but she does serve a purpose. I think all of the judges serve a purpose and I don’t mind the banter between them either. My favorite is when Randy boos Simon (I love giving someone a good, loud, lengthy “boooooo” every once in awhile). Ryan, who we rely on to be nonpartisan, seemed meaner than usual this year but I don’t think booting him is the answer either. Seriously, who else can let us know that “THIS is Ammmmerican Idol” with such conviction?
So what kind of changes are necessary?
1. Well, for starters, there’s no need for a one-hour results show; 30 minutes would be sufficient. Thank you, Comcast, for creating the DVR!
2. I’m not sure who (if anyone) is banging down the door to be a “mentor” on the show but this year’s choices were pretty sad. And was a facelift a prerequisite for mentoring?
3. Something NEEDS to be done to prevent the show from being the popularity contest that it is…I believe limiting the votes per household is not off the table.
4. I’ve heard that the producers are considering giving the auditions a lot less air time…another thank you! Auditions were absolutely cringe-worthy this year. It appeared that many people showed up for the auditions on a mission: to get their 15 minutes of fame for being the worst singer, wearing the ugliest clothes, swearing at Simon or simply wanting to stand out as the weirdest and most obnoxious. Unfortunately for us, FOX ate it up and gave these idiots exactly what they were looking for.
As for this year, we should be watching a finale that includes David Cook and Michael Johns but it was evident from David Archuleta's first performance in front of a live audience that he would be here until the end. Apparently those crying, screaming 10-year-olds we see in the audience also have faster fingers and stay up later than me and my counterparts. Yes, the boy has a great voice but he has not at all evolved in the 3 months we’ve been watching him; he has zero stage presence and can’t answer simple interview questions. And it makes me angry that so few people agree with me on this (I wish you could all hear my impression of him and his dum-dee-dum personality). Most moms and grandmothers think he’s “cute.” I prefer “goofy” and “awkward.” Maybe people are just voting for him because they know if he doesn’t win his father might bludgeon him to death or suffocate him with one of those ridiculous, I’m-trying-way-too-hard-to-be-cool-and-live-vicariously-through-my-son scali caps. I guess it could be worse; we could've had another Sanjaya or Taylor Hicks in the group.
David Cook is far and away my favorite Idol contestant ever. Yes, some of his appendages seem oddly proportioned and he clearly styles his hair to cover up his impending baldness BUT he’s proved that he has range (must we be reminded that it IS a singing contest). The fact that he has the “look,” has great stage presence, can play a variety of instruments and change the arrangement of a song for the better are all bonuses. I hate to admit this but some of his performances have actually given me the chills (download his version of Mariah Carey's Always Be My Baby). I am, however, torn on whether or not I even want him to win. If he wins, his CD is destined to never make it into my collection. On the other hand, I REALLY don’t want to give David Archuleta’s dad the satisfaction of winning and then having to see the entire Archuleta family hit the media circuit for the next few weeks. I guess that means it’s a lose-lose situation for me. All I can do now is the same thing I’ve been doing week after week for the past 3 months: vote until I fall asleep and hope for the best. America, you have roughly 48 hours until I regain my faith in you or lose it entirely.
Other reality shows I admit to watching:
The Bachelor
The Biggest Loser
Amazing Race
Supernanny
The Real World
Dr. 90210
The Next Food Network Star
Extreme Makeover
Temptation Island (no longer on the air but one of the most entertaining by far!)
Reality shows I’ve caught my husband watching and often sit down to join him:
The Real Housewives of Orange County
Rock of Love
Intervention
The Deadliest Catch
American Chopper
Miami Ink
Dirty Jobs
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